Going In Circles / Weigh-In Monday

“I know nothing stays the same
But if you’re willing to play the game
It’s coming around again”

Here we are again. Monday, already. I have no idea where the last week went. I have absolutely nothing to show for it, except for a few books read on my Kindle and some videos watched on YouTube. Of course the dreaded “Shark Week” is upon me again, but I’m hoping (finger crossed) that this month isn’t going to turn into another “Shark Fortnight” as I’ve been taking my Mefenamic Acid every morning without fail. But the usual hormonal bloat is here as expected and I’ll just go ahead and get my weekly weigh-in out of the way, because it too is showing exactly what I expected: a few pounds of “ghost-gain”. Last week I maintained, after a previous week’s loss of 5lbs. Last week I was 14 stone 9lbs (205lbs) and today the scale says I’m at 14 stone 12lbs (208lbs which means I’ve “gained” 3lbs this week. Really?

Urgh. I know it’s just hormones and water weight or whatever, but I’m starting to think I might be in a sort of plateau phase right now. It’s hard to know, because when I look back over my ‘Fat Stats’ for the past few months, I’m still doing the same thing where I:

  • Gain weight during “Shark Week/Fortnight”
  • Lose Weight
  • Maintain
  • Gain weight again because yet again “Shark Week/Fortnight”

Which is totally normal for me, but I’m not sure if my cycle is the thing causing me to have so many problems, or if I’m genuinely in a plateau phase right now. If it is a plateau, then cool, whatever; I knew I was due to hit one sooner or later because I’ve been losing steadily and happily enough for the past 6 months. I just wish I didn’t have to deal with the annoyance of “Aunt Flo” creating havoc for me, for anything up to 2 weeks out of month, because I’m starting to feel like I’m going around in circles. Gain, lose, maintain, gain. Repeat every month, ad – literal – nauseum.

If this is a plateau phase (however cunningly obfuscated by hormonal interferences) then I’ve planned for it. I expected it to happen and would be happy to use the few techniques I have at the ready, should weight loss start to stall for an extended period of time. I’m still not counting any calories in any of the food I eat, so there’s that to consider should the need arise (I was going to start reducing my portion sizes, but things seemed to be going okay without me needing to pay much attention to it, although that might be worth looking at now). I’ve also been reading up on some ways in which I can start to incorporate ‘Intermittent Fasting’ into my diet – which will need a bit of jiggling around with medication and whatnot, but should be ultimately doable if I work it out properly.

Plateaus just happen – especially to those of us with a lot of weight to lose – so there’s no need to get stressed about it. Just stick to your plan and keep doing what you’ve been doing for a few weeks and see how things pan out. Obviously, as we lose more and more weight, the amount of food we actually need to consume also decreases, so if weight loss stalls for more than a few weeks, it’s probably time to take a look at the amount of food you’re eating and maybe try reducing it a bit. I know all this and am fully prepared to start making the necessary adjustments to my diet, should it be the time to do so.

But I’m not entirely sure if I am in a plateau phase or not, because of the weird way that my weight fluctuates so much every month, because of my cycle. And I don’t want to jump the gun and begin tinkering with my food intake too early, because that will only mean I have even less wiggle-room to play with once the real plateau phase kicks in. I swear, the menopause can’t come early enough for me…but if my mother is anything to go by, I’ve got another 20 years of this monthly crap to endure before “Aunt Flo” finally packs up her stuff and moves out for good. Yikes!

Maybe it’s a plateau, maybe it’s just my hormones, maybe it’s Maybelline…frick knows what’s behind it right now, but I’m guessing this whole lockdown bullshit isn’t helping things. I’m definitely sleeping more and moving even less than usual, which is probably playing into how much food I actually need to consume every day. And my joints have been hurting a lot more than usual which means I haven’t been making much of an effort to go out for a walk, but then I never used any additional exercise as a means to increase or aid my weight-loss, so I doubt that’ll be having any impact in and of itself. I guess I just feel pretty ‘meh’ right now. Lockdown blues, hormonal mood, fibromyalgia playing up…I’m probably just being a whiny bitch, lol.

All I can do right now, is just keep on sticking to the plan, try to ride out this latest “visitation” and see where it leaves me at the end of it. I’ll probably give it a couple more months just keeping on with how I’ve been eating and then see if I need to re-evaluate my intake. Sure it’s annoying and frustrating to feel like I’m going in circles, but I knew going into this new way of eating that weight loss is rarely linear and that patience was going to be key to success. One thing I won’t be doing is veering off plan or giving myself any pathetic excuses to eat any carby junk. Sure I’ll probably have the odd bitch and moan on here about “Aunt Flo” and her shenanigans, but even if the scale is going up and down and all over the place, I’m committed to this way of eating for health, for the rest of my life. There are no good reasons or excuses for going off-plan and I’m not about to start trying to invent any, just to acquiesce to the inner sugar-addict who will forever be a monkey on my back.

My kitchen is stocked with plenty of good, nutritious foods, and I have some protein bars, nut butters and shakes on hand for those moments when I can’t countenance the idea of eating anything too substantial, but still need to put something in my stomach to take my meds with. I’ve also got a 12-pack of ‘Nano A Protein Pancakes’ on order from Amazon (because yes, my hormonally addled brain was seriously craving something cake-like and that ‘buy-it-now’ button is literally the devil in disguise, lol) which are allegedly going to be delivered by Thursday 1st April (omigod, we’re almost in April, already!) but the way my Amazon deliveries have been going lately, frick knows when (or if) they’ll actually get here.

I know, I know, I could probably make these myself, but I fricking hate cooking anything and it would have taken just as long for a packet of protein pancake mix to get here, as it would these pre-made ones (no, I don’t have a bunch of baking ingredients on hand to just make stuff…the only thing I have in common with Martha Stewart is our inherent dislike of taxation) and I was feeling very sorry for myself as “The Communists Started Squatting In My Neighbourhood And Began Kicking My Arse From The Inside Out”. The ingredients aren’t what a lot of people would consider “clean” keto, but I’m not actually doing any official keto, just low-carb with a maximum of 20g carbs a day.

Pancake: water, whey protein (milk) (VOLAC Volactive Ultra Whey 80 Instant), egg yolk, humectant (glycerine), wholemeal flour, sunflower oil, fillers (disodium diphosphate, sodium carbonate, calcium carbonate), maize starch, sweetener (sucralose), salt, preservative (potassium sorbate, sodium acetate).

Filling: water, sweetener, flavouring, modified starch, refined vegetable fat, low-fat cocoa powder, thickener (carboxymethylcellulose), flavouring, salt, preservative (potassium sorbate), emulsifier (polysorbate 60).

The nutritional panel says that each one contains 13.1g of carbohydrate with 2.8g of that being sugar. It’s tempting to just go with the amount of sugar in each one, but looking at the ingredients list, I think I’ll be better off counting the 13g total carbs when I eat these. I’m not planning on eating them every day (this month’s “Shark Week” will probably – hopefully! – be done with by the time my order even arrives) and I’ll try to keep most of them back until next month’s “visitation” when the hormonal need for something cake-like, rears its ugly head again.

But for now, I’m just going to settle for a protein-collagen-keto shake and a little squeezy sachet of ‘Pip & Nut Almond Butter’ to keep me going. I think I might even be up for a steak this evening – lord knows I could do with the iron boost! And I’ve got some ‘Green & Black’s 85% Dark Chocolate’ to have with a cup of coffee later in the evening or before I go to bed. The G&B bars are nicely portioned off into rows of 3 squares. 2 rows / 6 squares (18g) comes in at 4.2g of carbohydrate, with 2.6g of sugar. Being really dark and intense, those 2 little rows are just the right amount to give you a nice little hit of chocolatey loveliness, without any added polyols. Perfect for this time of the month.

Anyway, that’s all I have to share with ya’ll this weekly weigh-in. I really must get around to posting some mid-week stuff in here too…I just seem to keep blinking and before I know it, another 7 days have rolled around. Fecking lockdown bollocks! Right now, I’m off to lie down and listen to ‘Chemtrails Over The Country Club’ for a bit and try to get my arse to stop feeling like I’ve dislocated by left buttock. I’m so rock ‘n roll y’all, lol!

Stay sane folks


Oops / Weigh-In Monday (Except It’s Tuesday, Because…Reasons)

“I guess I’ll never know where your head is at…
…I’ll be forgetting the blue.”

Yes, I know. It’s Tuesday, not Monday, but if I thought I was lost in some weird dreamlike state last week, this week has been even worse. I literally forgot what day it was because who cares anymore, when everyday is lockdown day and somehow we’re almost into April, when it was only just Christmas like, 5 minutes ago. I haven’t even gotten dressed in about 3 days now, and I’m not even remotely exaggerating when I tell y’all that I slept for over 28hrs between Sunday and today. Seriously, I only got up to use the bathroom, take meds and crawl back into bed for another of my epic sleep-a-thons. The only reason I ended up realising what day it was, was when I went to check the date on my phone to see if my turkey-burgers were still okay to eat.

And it turned out that I’d pretty much slept through Monday, forgot all about weighing in and basically just checked out of reality there for a while. Yikes. At this rate it’s going to be Christmas again and I’ll have zero idea where the entire year went. I’m so unbelievably sick of all this lockdown bollocks and just want the government to open everything back up, and let us all decide for ourselves how much we want to isolate or wear those pointless fricking masks (which, spoiler alert: don’t fucking work!) I’ve already had Covid once, I don’t care if I get it again because weirdly enough, I have this in-built thing called an immune system that’s been fighting off coronaviruses since the day I was born. People have been conditioned to think that this Covid-19 thing is a new thing and that it’s a special novel coronavirus that’s gonna kill us all. It’s not. Coronaviruses are nothing new. Most of us will contract this one and either be asymptomatic or have mild symptoms, just like we do whenever there’s a seasonal cold or flu going around. The people who are at risk, are always at risk from ALL the viruses (coronaviruses or otherwise) and can choose to protect themselves accordingly. But the majority of people will NOT die from this bullshit. I really wish more people would understand that and free themselves from this pathological fear of contracting something that isn’t going to kill them. Masks don’t prevent the spread of aerosolised virus particles from exhalation, so all we’re doing is engaging in a dumb collective performative act of compliance. And we’re letting governments eradicate our civil liberties whilst we do it. Just fucking enough already!

Grr…this shit makes me so angry. The average person just takes what they’re told at face value and allow themselves to be terrorised into weak, compliant, cowed responses because they aren’t even aware of what powers a government should really have over their personal freedoms. I’m an adult. If I want to expose myself to a multitude of risk factors, that’s on me. If you really believe that masks work, then you should be happy to wear one for yourself, fully content with the protection you believe that it’s giving you. That I do or do not choose to wear one shouldn’t matter to you. If they work, yours is working for you. If yours isn’t protecting you, then you really have to stop and think about why that is, and maybe consider why we’re all continuing to go along with this bullshit charade.

I’m just especially pissed off today because I woke up to find that I’d been sent a letter “inviting” me to get vaccinated, because my priority group were now being called. Yeah, no, not gonna happen bro. Don’t need one, not getting one. If y’all think you need one and you think it’s going to protect you (against a constantly mutating virus, despite having been created from a previous strain) then you do you. If it works, you’ll be golden, right? I’m just going to keep on relying upon the immune system I was born with and expose myself to as many germs as I always have, because that’s what’s kept me alive thus far. I don’t own a hand sanitizer; never have, never will. I only ever wash my hands if I’m preparing food or after I’ve been to the bathroom. Or if they get something icky on them. Drenching ourselves in sanitizer isn’t healthy. Understanding germ theory and implementing a basic level of sanitation is one thing; killing off everything so our immune systems stop working at all is fucking ridiculous. That letter about getting vaccinated went straight in the bin. Fuck that.

Anyway, rant over. I weighed myself earlier and this week I’ve just maintained. Which is pretty predictable if I look back over the past few months. I’ve also got really sore boobs, cramps and kinda want chocolate, which means it’s time for another visit from “Aunt Flo”.

“WTF? Already? Didn’t we just get over the last ‘visitation’?”

Yeah, that’ll be the ‘time-meaning-absolutely-freaking-nothing-anymore’ thing again. Plus, last time went on for about a fortnight, so with my cycle still being 28 days long (ish) there was only 2 weeks off before this month’s was due again. This time around though, I’ve started taking the Mefenamic Acid immediately after getting that first twinge. If I take it every day (and don’t make the mistake of stopping taking it too soon, like last month) then I might be lucky enough to get away with just the regular “Shark Week” instead of the “Shark Fortnight” I’ve been having of late. Either way, I’m still going to probably end up seeing a “ghost-gain” on the scale next week…so there’s that to look forward to. Yippee!

As you can see, I’m in a pretty crappy mood today. I’d like to just chalk it up to the impending hormonal shenanigans, but I’m just generally pissed off with all this lockdown crapola and want my freedom back. So I’m just going to end this post here before I go off on another rant. To cheer y’all up though, here’s a little meme that’ll make everyone laugh, no matter where they sit on the mask-wearing opinion spectrum. Enjoy:

Have a good week folks


Manic Panic

I have never enjoyed ‘shopping’ in actual stores IRL. Be it trying to hunt down a book that I’m interested in (which will invariably not actually be stocked in our local bookshop because my interests are generally more esoteric than the latest bilge-fest of woke clap-trap that everyone is falling over themselves to be “seen” to be reading – I ain’t wasting my money on books that try to make me feel guilty about being white, or that try to push the new “stunning & brave” narratives about black, Muslim, gay, transgendered drag-queens, or feminist revisionism that wants us all to believe that women did all the things that won the second world war – bite me!) or navigating the supermarket aisles in Sainsburys to get the weekly shop. It’s always just an annoyingly necessary evil that leaves me wanting to hole up in my house and avoid the rest of the population forever.

Queuing is soul-destroying, waiting for sales-assistants to go pretend to look for an item they know they don’t have in stock is infuriating, and trying to push a trolley past the groups of women stood 3-4 deep in the middle of an aisle while they talk about the same shit they post on each other’s Facebook walls, ALL drives me completely nuts and makes me wish ‘tier 5’ lockdowns were a permanent fixture. I’ve never understood how some people actually consider shopping to be a fun, recreational pursuit; it’s literally just a means to an end. Sure, the things you purchase might be super-cool, useful or pretty to wear…but the act of going out to procure said items? It’s a boring, time-consuming task that sucks the absolute life out of me!

But online shopping? Man, that shit is the greatest improvement to my everyday life, since mp3-players made it possible to carry my entire music collection around in my pocket! Especially since I live in a very small, quiet area that doesn’t even have a pound-shop in it. I might not enjoy actual IRL shopping, but clicking a few buttons and getting whatever I want delivered to my door, has become something of an obsession with me. I just went over my list of online purchases in my bullet-journal, added up the cost of everything I’ve been buying lately, and it turns out that I’ve spent £966.54 (roughly $1321.59 USD) on Amazon and £298.21 (roughly $408 USD) on Ebay, since December 3rd! That doesn’t take into consideration any of the other online stores I regularly buy from or any of my regular IRL shopping. Oh, and none of that had anything to do with Christmas shopping, or clothes shopping or any bigger, considered purchases – it’s all just “stuff” that I decided I needed over the past 2 months. The only thing I really have to show for all that is a boat-load of protein bars that I’m accumulating way faster than I’m consuming them, a couple of bottles of perfume and a few notebooks/journals. I seriously don’t know how I managed to spend so much.

So of course, this past week I found myself back on Amazon, buying even more stuff, because why the frick not? I have this weird fear, front and centre in my mind (a fear that isn’t necessarily irrational, since the recent lockdowns created all the panic-buying madness that stripped supermarkets of pretty much everything) that something is going to happen to stop me from being able to buy everything I need, so I’m bulk-buying EVERYTHING from toilet-roll and deodorant, to frozen veg and ibuprofen, and stashing it away in case of emergency. And it’s not an altogether ridiculous notion really. Being prepared for all eventualities is actually a really good idea – as recent events have definitely shown us. But I think having changed to a low-carb WOE has really reinforced that idea for me, precisely because I don’t have as much access to the same range of stores as someone in a big town or city might have.

I know that at the most basic level, I can normally get by on fresh, locally sourced meat and produce. Great. But when this lockdown crap starts to ramp up, tier by tier, the local butchers end up shutting down temporarily and access to supermarkets becomes even more restricted (there are no 24hr stores open around here). After the first wave of lockdown madness, supermarkets and other stores responded by only allowing customers to purchase limited amounts of products – which is entirely understandable – and that was actually pretty inconvenient for me, because a lot of what I eat is the same thing on a daily basis. Letting me only buy two bags of broccoli just isn’t enough and the hassle of having to get taxis to-and-from the shops every time I went out just made everything a huge pain in the arse. I eat a LOT of meat and fresh veg and there have been some days where I literally couldn’t purchase as much as I needed to get me through the week.

Yeah, I know these are just the #FirstWorldProblems of someone with more specialised dietary requirements, but I’m not about to screw up all my hard work and efforts at improving my health…just because of some new restrictions put in place to “allegedly” keep me (and everyone else) healthy. Having fibro/arthritis also impacts the amount of times I can get out and actually go shopping too, so I have to try and be as creative with my time spent leaving the house, as possible. Whenever I go out I have to work out the best way to hit as many of the few shops as I can of the few shops in my locale. But as weeks rush by it just feels like my household stores are dwindling faster and faster, so online shopping has become a total life-saver.

Nobody knows how much longer this palaver with lockdowns is going to go on for – we seem to be getting different messages from the government on a day-to-day basis – and that’s really triggered the little panic-mode alarm to go off in the back of my head. I do NOT want to hear next week that we’re being escalated back up to a tier-7 level lockdown and are only allowed to visit the shops once or twice a week, only to find once I get there that my ability to purchase stuff is so severely restricted that I simply cannot make sufficient meals for the following 7 days. So…I’ve been bulk-ordering a bunch of stuff from Amazon and stashing it away in case things get more difficult. I’ve already mentioned in a previous post, what protein powders I use and I’ve stocked up on a good half a dozen of each of those recently, on top of those buckets of Manilife Deep Roast Peanut Butter (we’ve got them stashed in cupboards and on shelves all over the kitchen) and crates of sugar-free energy drinks.

Protein bars though…they’re my absolute obsession. I eat about 6 or 7 of them a week, but I’m buying boxes of them at least twice a week, leading to my acquiring quite the stash. I have a load in a huge oversized shopping bag in the front room, but they’re also squirreled away in my filing cabinet, in the spare room, and in the bottom drawer of the plastic storage drawers we keep in the bathroom (it’s mainly used to keep skincare stuff in it, but now the other half thinks I have some weird eating disorder that has me keeping protein-bars in there too. Dude, I’m not sat eating the damn things on the toilet like some freakish secret-eater…I’m literally just running out of places to store them, lol!)

But I feel a lot less stressed out just knowing that I’ve always got these suitable food-stuffs tucked away (all over the house, lol) should lockdown restrictions get even more insane and I start to feel as though I just don’t have enough food in to keep me going. It’s like my inner ‘Doomsday Prepper’ has begun to rear its ugly head and I want to be prepared for any and EVERY actuality. My other half has never had to worry about his weight (the guy took his very sculpted physique and actually sat for a bunch of life-modelling classes, completely naked, because he’s just THAT comfortable with his – incredibly nice – body!) but I’ve been trying to get him to swap out his regular Mars Bars and Snickers Bars, for their higher-protein/lower sugar alternatives. He thinks I’m nuts, but they don’t taste any different to the ones he usually eats, so he’s happy to oblige my nagging and go for the high-protein versions…even if it’s just to get me off his back, lol. So I’m also stashing boxes of those around the house for him too, in case lockdown life gets any harder. I’ve even been binge-watching Steve1989MRE’s channel and will probably be ordering some of the MRE food parcels he often reviews, just so I know that there’s always going to be plenty of food on-hand for himself, should the end-of-the-world happen.

Does all that sound mental? Probably. But I would much rather bulk-buy a tonne of stuff that I don’t necessarily need, than leave it all to the chance of my permitted trips to the supermarket, potentially leaving me short of enough food to get me through the days ahead. And I’m still 47lb away from meeting my 100lb goal, so I’ve got plenty of fat stores on my body to survive on. But I know how much harder it is to endure an enforced lack of food, than to go through an intentional fasting period of my own doing. Does that make sense? Because I’ve never been unlucky enough to not have access to food. The only times I’ve had to go without are on days when I’ve literally just been too lazy to do a food shop and found myself scratching around the kitchen trying to make a meal out of whatever weird dry-food crap is tucked away at the back of my cupboards. This lockdown thing is the first time I’ve ever had to worry about not having stuff in my kitchen to see me through the week. And I’m not gonna lie, it really does scare me. The virus doesn’t worry me (I had it last year and it was less intense than a regular flu or bad cold) but the idea of being stranded in my house, banned from going anywhere by the bloody government and not having enough low-carb foods on hand frightens me.

And I know that’s a lot to do with control. I’m a bit of a control freak and like to think that I’ve always got everything taken care of. This lockdown has taken away my ability to have the absolute control I need in order to feel comfortably able to stick to my health goals. It’s taken me out of my comfort zone and made me realise that I am also vulnerable to certain events upsetting not just my everyday routine, but my plans for losing weight. And I HATE that. Having to try and be all zen and accepting of the daily changes to how I live my life? I am so NOT about that, lol. Change isn’t something I fear…when it’s on my own terms. But this imposed set of changes that I have no control over? Nah, this shit drives me crazy. Hence the ‘panic-buying’ shenanigans. I know that fear is at the root of this behaviour and that I’m trying to assert a sense of control over my life by doing it…but I also know that logically, I’m being a bit insane and worrying a bit too much. I just refuse to let things get beyond my control, to a point where I end up having to resort to eating off-plan. Because there’s absolutely no reason for me to allow that to happen. Every meal is a choice and I’m choosing to make every meal count. Screw resorting to off-plan crap, just because the world is going cray-cray. I’ll be damned if I’m gonna let the goddamn ‘rona stop me from getting where I need to be!

We all just gotta do, whatever we need to do to get through these crazy times. And if turning my house into some low-carb bug-out shelter eases my stresses a little bit, then my other half is just going to have to get used to finding tubs of peanut butter and protein bars in the strangest of places. Because if the zombie apocalypse does end up hitting us, he’s gonna be coming to me for food supplies before the week is out!

Stay prepped y’all!


The Keto Police / Weigh-In Day

Is it just me or is anyone else also finding that despite being back in lockdown, there still don’t seem to be enough hours in the day to get everything done? It feels like a kind of inverse take on Parkinson’s Law. For those not familiar with the term, Parkinson’s Law is the old adage that:

“Work expands to fill the time allotted.”

Put simply, the amount of work required adjusts to the time available for its completion, which means the time it would take someone to complete a task seems to increase when that person has a longer amount of time in which to do so. It’s a humorous commentary on the ever expanding, banal world of bureaucracy and if you’ve ever worked in an large office or in government, you’ll totally recognise the truth in this “law”. But I’m having the opposite problem right now: the more free time I have, the busier I find myself getting as my never-ending to-do list just keeps expanding to fill all that extra time.

One thing that’s actually helping to save time however, is buying a lot of the products I use online and having them delivered directly to my door. I absolutely hate shopping (which seems to be quite unusual for a woman) and not just because I now get really sore and easily tired. I’ve always hated it. So the increasing availability of online shopping over the years has been an absolute boon to me and my other half. Especially when I live in such a small, bucolic area which simply doesn’t have the variety of huge, sprawling shops that the larger towns and cities have. (Which, by the way, I absolutely would never trade; I’ll take the unspoilt, safe, little oasis of calm, over the crime-ridden, dirty, noisy, illegal-migrant-infested shitholes, ANY day!)

I purchase all my fresh groceries from local suppliers, because it’s just so much nicer than mass-produced supermarket crap. I buy ethically farmed, grass-fed beef from a local butcher, dairy products from our small local creamery and chicken & eggs from small farms who only raise free-range / free-to-roam birds and don’t use a bunch of hormones or inject water into them to create artificially huge breast meat. Almost all of my vegetables are grown locally, which just makes it so much easier to ensure freshness – although I do buy bags of frozen Brussel sprouts from Marks & Spencer, because they only take 4 mins to cook and sometimes I just get a mad urge to eat a bowl of buttered sprouts, which makes them a super-quick snack food!

But finding more specialist products that help me to follow my low-carb way of eating, requires access to online suppliers. There are some items available in the health food shop, but ours is very small and simply cannot stock everything I want or need. Outside of lockdown, it’s okay for grabbing the odd protein bar or vitamin / mineral supplement if I run out, but again, I dislike having to faff around in actual shops and they rarely stock exactly what I’m after. So, like most people, I rely on Amazon for the majority of products I need, because you really can buy almost anything, either directly from Amazon themselves or from hundreds of thousands of third-party sellers all over the world. And when you’re following a more specialist WOE that level of choice can really make all the difference.

I know that the low-carb / keto police will say that if you’re doing “clean” keto, you don’t need anything other than the fresh produce I mentioned earlier, but screw those guys, lol. Everyone has their own way of making their particular WOE not only doable right now, but permanently sustainable in the long term; so if what you’re doing works for you and is something you can envision doing for the rest of your life, then you do you, boo. Losing weight and improving your health isn’t supposed to be some competition where y’all need to see who can be the most “perfect”the only person you are ever in competition with is the person you were yesterday. So if you’re getting good results and making gradual changes to your habits, which will give you long-term benefits that you can sustain over time, then keep it up. Read everything you can, get informed and equip yourself with sufficient knowledge to help you to make the choices you need to make your WOE work for you. But find the “sweet spot” of balance between absolute rigidity and capricious abandon, and you’ll find it so much easier to do what you need, to get the results you want.

Obviously I don’t mean that you can adulterate your own plan so much that it contradicts the basic underlying principles as laid out by its creators / proponents (I mean, you can’t call your WOE low-carb if you’re eating 400g of carbs a day!) but if making this a lifestyle that you can adhere to forever means you eat the odd protein bar, drink sugar-free soda or make the occasional keto-friendly dessert, then just freaking do it. It’s entirely possible to overhaul your old bad habits, change your WOE and be successful in your weight-loss attempts, without living a monk-like existence of pious asceticism. I mean, hey, if that’s what you enjoy and that rigidity works for you then cool. Go for it. But if you think that everyone needs to comply with your monastic standards – and the corollary of that means that you become an authoritative douchebag about it – then seriously bro: get over yourself; get another hobby.

Sorry, I didn’t mean to go off on a rant there, but I saw some insane comments on a site recently which had me rolling my eyes so far back in my head, I could see my own amygdala. A guy who had gone from over 300lb to 170lb over the course of 2 years, who had gone from being morbidly obese, to a little overweight, who had cured his pre-diabetes, stopped taking tablets for blood pressure, had gone from zero exercise to running 5K and going to the gym 4 times a week and just generally improved all of his health markers…he was lambasted for having eaten protein bars (can’t remember the brand) and having made his own keto fat-bombs every weekend, because:

“That’s not doing it properly. It’s not clean keto!”

So fucking what? The dude just spent 2 years getting his body from a sedentary, pre-diabetic blob, to being a healthy, fit example of someone who made consistently better choices, and this sanctimonious prick was trying to discredit the dude’s efforts AND results, because he didn’t follow whatever stringent ideals that said prick had decided were somehow set in stone? Get bent. That dude probably saved his own life, or at least extended it by a good 40 years. He set his mind to making himself fit & healthy, succeeded, and then got told that it doesn’t matter because he didn’t do it the “perfect” way?? Man, the keto police really can be intolerable fuckwits sometimes! Thankfully, there were plenty of other posters who came to this dude’s defence and told the sanctimonious prick to shut the hell up, but I really felt for the guy being dismissed like that.

If someone is posting that they’re not getting the results the want and upon further inquiry it turns out that they’re just making so many incorrect, uninformed choices that there’s no way it’s ever going to work for them, then by all means try to help point them in the right direction. If you’re more experienced and knowledgeable about the plan / WOE that the individual in question is purporting to follow, and they’re distressed because they aren’t getting results, then sure, the decent thing is to offer some advice and share your expertise to help that person get on track and start to see the results they desperately want. But when someone is actually being successful in their efforts and is just sharing their results with who they think will be a group of like-minded folk, don’t be a dick and try to poke holes in their methods just because they didn’t get there using your own preferred methods of absolute rigidity. You aren’t doing it to be helpful; you’re being a pious cockwomble.

Anyway. Enough of that for now. I just had that comment fresh in my mind today and really wanted to vent about it. I was going to share some more of the products I’ve been using myself recently, but I’ll save that for a separate post later on in the week. Now, it’s time to update y’all on my own progress over the past 7 days – although it’s really only the past 6 days, not 7, as I’m trying to get my weigh-in days back to being on a Monday now that the kerfuffle of Christmas festivities has passed. So, where were we last week? Well, if you remember my post Revenge Of The Chia Seeds from last Tuesday, I’d had a bit of a “situation” (lol) which led me to getting very swollen and sore. As a result the scale showed a 1lb gain (which was probably slightly lighter than I would have been a couple of days prior to weighing in) but whatever, shit happens. Or sometimes doesn’t…which was actually kinda the problem, lol.

Today though, I hopped on the scale not long after I woke up and the little screen said that my current weight is: 15 stone 7lb / 217lbs. So that means, that in the past 6 days I’ve lost 2lb! Yay! We are inching closer and closer to “onederland” folks; just 18lbs more and I’m out of the 200’s – hopefully forever! But right now I’m just happy to be losing steadily – save for the odd week when I manage to sabotage my progress by bunging up my digestive tract with bloody chia seeds, lol. I’m really expecting to see my weight-loss slow down a bit in the coming weeks, because I’ve already lost over half my initial target of 100lb. I know I still have a long way to go, but the human body loves to fight against our attempts to shift the flab, so it’s perfectly normal to start seeing smaller incremental losses as time goes by; as well as the inevitable dreaded plateaus that everyone should expect when they’re trying to lose weight.

Today though, I’m another 2lbs down and that’s awesome! Dinner tonight is going to be a massive salad with tuna fish, jalapeno cheese, crumbled pork rinds, a few pecan nuts and a pickled onion. I’ve already eaten a protein brownie cookie today (half with my meds when I got up and the other half with a cup of coffee and cream an hour or so ago) as well as a ‘Rockstar Hardcore Apple’ sugar-free energy drink and a tablespoon of ‘Manilife Deep Roast Crunchy Peanut Butter’ when I took my vitamins and supplements. I’ve got my water bottle next to me as I type this and I’m aiming to get through a couple of those today – more so if I feel the need for it.

And on that note I shall call it a day for now guys. My digestive system seems to be back to normal now (thankfully) and it’s great to see the scale continue to move in a largely downward trend. Have a lovely week, wherever you are and may the gods of weight loss shine down upon you, as you work towards achieving your own goals.

Stay determined folks